Bummin'

Ok, I feel a little out of the loop because apparently this happened a week ago, but UGA basketball player Kevin Brophy was killed in a car accident. I didn't know him personally, so I can't exactly claim to be devastated by the news. But I'm still more upset than most people would think I should be. Being in the band, I had to attend each home game for the men's team when I otherwise wouldn't have. (I mean, let's be honest. We weren't very good.) In doing so, I started to feel like I knew the players in a way. Brophy wasn't a first stringer (as I recall) and he certainly wasn’t one of our bigger players (though he did have a pretty mean three-point shot), but he always played hard and seemed to really enjoy playing. And that earns my respect.

More importantly, he was by all accounts just a decent human being. It’s always tragic when a young life is ended, particularly when it’s so unexpected. But it seems to me to be somehow even more tragic when that young life meant so much to so many people. I’m trying my best not to be sappy and overdramatic because like I said I didn’t know him personally. But it still upsets me. And that’s all I feel qualified to say.

Th@nk you for smoking

I feel like I should preface this by saying that I don’t smoke. I’ve probably smoked less than a dozen cigarettes in my entire life, and I smoked my first cigar after beating Florida -- and it was one of the worst nights of my life. No one told me you’re not supposed to inhale. I have since smoked three cigars, all for celebratory purposes. I think habitual cigarette smoking is disgusting, and one of the least attractive things a girl can do.

All that said, I find the extremist anti-smoking campaign to be absolutely infuriating. The most recent example of such is a commercial in which a Brillo-headed activist enters a mattress store and asks the clerk if there are any warning labels on mattresses. After the clerk rightly asks what the hell this weirdo is talking about, the weirdo replies “In 1981, a tobacco company executive said that maybe sleep should be banned since the majority of people die in their sleep.”

The commercial ends with the activist sarcastically asking “A tobacco company saying we should ban sleep?”

That doesn’t even make sense! Nowhere in the commercial is smoking even mentioned. Gee, banning sleep, I’m sure whoever said that was totally serious. Not to mention that it was said 25 years ago. So, we’re using a joke from two and a half decades ago to blast tobacco companies? Really? That’s the best we can do? Wow.

I’m also staunchly opposed to smoking bans imposed on private businesses. For what it’s worth, I don’t really buy the argument that it hurts business, because all indications are that it doesn’t. But it’s the principle of the matter. Business owners should be allowed to run their businesses as they see fit. If they want to allow people to smoke, they should have that right. If people don’t want to be exposed to smoke, they aren’t being forced to patron or be employed at said business, anymore than they’re being forced to enter the smoker’s home.

If the government wants to ban smoking in its buildings, that’s the government’s business. But government has no, well, business, telling citizens how to treat their private property.

I’m also sick of lawsuits against tobacco companies for selling a harmful product. It tells you it’ll give you cancer right on the package! It’s been there for 40 years! What more do you people need? If people still want to smoke, by God let them kill themselves. But anyone who started smoking after 1965 has no right to claim that they didn’t know smoking was bad for them, and therefore has no right to punitive damages.

It infuriates me when corporations are held responsible for the bad decisions of individuals. It also infuriates me when 25 year old quotes are taken out of context in an attempt to make an entire industry look evil. I have several friends that smoke, and I think it’s disgusting and stupid and wish they didn’t do it. But hey, this is America and you can be disgusting and stupid if you want to be disgusting and stupid. If, however, you get cancer, emphysema, or any other disease, you have no one to blame but yourself.

Hmm...all this indignation makes me want a cigarette.

De|ight in War

"De|ight in war is a merit in the soldier, a dangerous quality in the captain and a positive crime in the statesman." -George S@nt@yana.

My philosophical persuasion tends to get me branded as a trigger-happy warmonger, but I like to think I'm slightly more passive than that. As I see it, there are two extremes on the matter: the far Left, that believes that nothing is worse than war and that it should be avoided at all costs; and the far Right, that would rather go to war than pursue diplomacy. It seems to me that there are far more members of the left extreme than the right, but they both nonetheless exist.

I tend towards the right side, though I am not as gung-ho on military force as some might expect. I tend to agree more with John S+uart Mi||, who said that "War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse." I also agree with Niccolo Machiavelli when he said that "War cannot be avoided. It can only be postponed to the advantage of others."

It goes without saying that I believe that war should not be avoided at all costs. War should definitely be avoided, sure, but not when the results from the avoidance of war are worse than they would be if the war had actually taken place.

There comes a time when people must realize that negotiation and diplomacy serve no purpose and that war becomes not an agent of aggression, but a necessity for survival. With recent developments, I'm believing more and more that Israel is reaching this point.

Granted, it is my firm belief that Israel's negotiations and diplomacy with the Muslim world have never served any purpose. But with the advent of weapons of mass destruction and what seems to be the imminent nuclearization of Iran, Israel now faces its largest existential threat to since its 1948 inception -- and was drawn into a war for its survival the day after.

During the last few years, we've been told that if Israel only pulled out of Gaza, there would be peace. Or if Israel would only pull out of Lebanon, there would be peace. Both have since come to pass, and neither have led to peace -- much like every other supposed proposal for peace from the Muslim world.

The stated goal of many in the Muslim world is the complete destruction of Israel, so I fail to see how negotiations or diplomacy will ever be useful. Thus, Israel shouldn't bother with them anymore. It should only do what is necessary to ensure its own survival. If that entails invading Lebanon, bombing Syria or preempting Iran, well, they shouldn't shy away from it. Unlike their adversaries, Israel need not destroy the entire Muslim world to achieve security.

Aw shucks

Ok, so it's my birthday. Or at least it was til about three and a half hours ago. I am now the ripe old age of 23. It feels suspiciously like the spry, young age of 22. I'm still the youngest member of my peer group, but I'm hoping that maybe now people will stop saying 'aww...' after I tell them my age.

I've never been much into birthdays, so don't feel too guilty if you forgot/didn't know. That said, I really appreciate all of you that took the time to say something. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. You're way better at that than I am. I am a notorious birthday-forgetter.

It was a pretty uneventful birthday, but I'm ok with that. The Braves won, I set a new record time on Minesweeper, won about $15,000 in fake money poker and learned some new songs on guitar. Could've been worse.

I was hoping to write about all the stuff I've learned over the past year in one of those numbered posts that people seem to like so much, but uh...I can't really think of anything that I know now that I didn't know a year ago. If I think of anything, I'll let you know.

I can't really complain about the past year, though. I've done more things than I ever thought I would and had a hell of a time doing them. Naturally, there are things I wish I could've improved over last year, but they'll all come in time, I'm sure. All in all, not bad. Steady as she goes.

Pretty pretty pandas

In the spirit on Mon+y Py+hon, now here's something completely different. As you may know, the National Zoo in D.C. has two pandas on loan from the cesspool of oppression known as the Chinese government. You may also know that a year ago, the seemingly oblivious fuzzballs actually figured out the mating process (this is actually an accomplishment for pandas) and made another panda. For more information on this process, please see...oh nevermind.

At any rate, my mom's in town and she wanted to see them. We happened to luck out and catch them at their feeding time. Here are some of the particularly adorable pictures.

T@i Sh@n, the cub, straight chillin'. And yes, he's scratching himself.



The cub being difficult and rolling around in the food.



The cub trying to wrestle his mother and losing horribly.



The cub literally biting his mother in the face. Aw.

Can we stop pretending the UN serves a purpose now?

Michelle asked me a two tier question on the North Korean issue, so I thought I’d do my best to oblige her.

First of all, my general opinion:

I must say, I didn’t think Kim Jong I| was stupid/crazy enough to launch any missiles. Apparently, I was wrong. However, it’s starting to look like that maybe it wasn’t so stupid or crazy after all. Now that the initial indignation has passed, it looks like they might actually get away with it.

Any time a matter is referred to the security council of the ‘United’ Nations, it’s a pretty safe bet that the outcome is going to be totally impotent and ineffective. To wit, China only wants to issue a ‘presidential statement,’ which is the international equivalent of a slightly irritated letter. Non-binding, non-threatening, non-important. It doesn’t even qualify as a slap on the wrist, as there is no slapping. It’s pretty much just telling North Korea that they did a naughty thing and they better feel guilty about it. Totally worthless. I might as well do it on my blog. It’d be just as effective.

At any rate, to its credit, Japan is actually considering a military strike on North Korea. I say go for it. Incidentally, Japan is also backing a UN Resolution that would threaten sanctions against North Korea. It originally actually imposed sanctions against North Korea, but they’ve since backed off because China and or Russia would likely veto such a measure.

Not that sanctions are a good idea anyway. They’re not. Forgive me if I’m not impressed by the idea of imposing sanctions on a nation that has already had a few million people die of starvation and already deals more on the black market than the legit economy. Sanctions aren’t going to do anything except starve more people.

In my humble but accurate opinion, the only way to solve this crisis is to topple the regime and start over. Granted, not many people are too keen on this idea -- particularly China -- because such a scenario would lead to tens of millions of refugees flooding into China, causing a ‘humanitarian crisis.’

I find it curious that it’s only when they cross into China that these people constitute a ‘humanitarian crisis.’ They’re already starving at the hands of a maniacal dictator who spends more on the military than feeding his citizens. That sounds like a crisis to me. But hey, I suppose as long as they stay on their side of the border, China shouldn’t have to worry about it.

On a bit of a side note, I think this is a little tongue-in-cheek diplomacy by President Bush. After five years of being told he doesn’t use enough diplomacy, he’s saying ‘Alright, you want diplomacy? Here you go.’

I don’t expect anything meaningful to come out of the UN, but I don’t expect it to happen for a while. That is to say, it’s going to be a while before we realize that we wasted our time. (And just think, these are the same people dealing with Iran, too! Hooray!)

This is a real test for the UN. And as I totally expected, they’re completely blowing it. If they don’t deal with this crisis effectively, they’ll lose, or at least should lose, any remaining shred of credibility they might still have. Not that I would be horribly upset by that, but I’d rather not have to fight a war to expose the UN’s impotence.

I would, however, be thrilled if Japan happened to send a few bombs into Korea. But I’m not holding my breath for that, either.

Michelle also asked why we’re so indignant toward North Korea but don’t get upset when India tests missiles. Well, since it’s after 2:00 am and I actually have stuff to do tomorrow, I’ll give the short answer. Which is essentially: India is a stable democracy that isn’t using its nuclear program to threaten anyone (with the possible exception of Pakistan.) North Korea is a propped-up communist dictatorial regime headed by a clinically insane pervert with delusions of grandeur. One of these can be trusted with nuclear weapons, the other needs a hardy beating. It’s just a shame that they’re probably not going to get it.

36-50

I thought of more:

36. I’m ranked a 22 in H@lo 2 on XBox Live. I don’t know how good that is.

37. I absolutely despise MySp@ce. I can’t be on the site for more than two minutes without a substantial rise in my blood pressure.

38. My favorite alcohol is Bai|ey’s Irish Cream. The stuff is like candy.

39. The first song I ever learned on guitar was Adam S@ndler’s “The Ch@nukah Song.” It’s only three chords. The second song I ever learned was V@n Morrison’s “Brown Eyed Gir|.” It’s only four chords. Plus I tend to attracted to, well, brown eyed girls. So it’s handy.

40. I think O.J. totally did it.

41. One of my major pet peeves is people that think they’re funny but aren’t. Other pet peeves include arrogance, whining, and people that need to be the center of attention. Oh, and black people. (See #4.)

42. I’ve beaten the expert level of Minesweeper only once. Wait, no, make that twice. (I really did beat it while writing this post.)

43. I have an award for having one of the best restaurants in D.C. I don’t have a restaurant, just the award.

44. Bi|| O’Rei||y gets on my nerves a little.

45. Pinstripe suits are my favorite.

46. I prefer regular Popt@rts to frosted.

47. If there was another city other than D.C. I would want to live in, it’d be Manhattan.

48. As it turns out, I am in fact NOT Rick J@mes, bitch.

49. I would thoroughly enjoy punching Wi|mer V@lderr@m@ in the face.

50. I’m really craving a hamburger right now.

50 35 Things You Don't Might Not Know About Me

I've been tinkering with this for a while. As usual, I got the idea from another blog. I thought it might be interesting, but it probably isn't. I'm not normally this self-centered, I promise. But here's some (at least slightly) interesting facts about me.

1. I don't see what the big deal is about Shakespeare. I was just never all that impressed with him. Though I did thoroughly enjoy performing Julius Caesar with sock-puppets in high school.

2. I don't like meat in Mexican food. I don't know why.

3. My nicknames include Grandpa, Hebie, Jewbert and Schroeder. Two recent additions are Chuckles and Sassypants.

4. I'm not racist, but have a tendency to make racial jokes just for the irony. I much prefer this to people that actually are racist but pretend they aren't.

5. I find piercings in any body part except for the ears puzzling, totally unnecessary and kinda trashy. I also find tattoos in general totally unnecessary and kinda trashy. Especially on women.

6. I'm more intimidated by people that I have authority over than I am by people who have authority over me. Go figure.

7. I consider my left side to be my 'good side.'

8. I once won a $40,000 scholarship in a piano competition. I didn't take it, but I do get a strange sense of satisfaction knowing that the person that did take it was only second best. I'm ruthless like that.

9. I played Carnegie Hall at the age of 14. It sounds a lot cooler than it is because the actual concert was pretty lame, but no one has to know that.

10. I'm ambidextrous in that I use my left hand to write/draw/paint, but use my right hand to throw, shoot, etc.

11. I'm really not that interesting.

12. I drive an old lady's car, but I drive it like a Mustang. It's to counter my friend who drives her Mustang like an old lady.

13. The only two famous people I've wanted to meet but haven't yet are the President and Ben Folds. Unless of course George A||en becomes president, in which case that would only leave Ben Folds.

14. My only vice is Krispy Kreme. I don't smoke or do drugs and I'm only a social drinker, but for a box of warm, chocolate-iced doughnuts, I'd tell you where my grandma hides her money.

15. I've only been inside a strip club once, and it was one of the most uncomfortable things I've ever done.

16. I've only seen one of the new Star Wars movies, and only two of the old ones. I'm ok with that.

17. I sleep on my stomach. I also cuddle anything soft within arms reach, and I will not let it go.

18. The only class of instrument I've never played is woodwind. Reeds give me goosebumps.

19. I don't ride roller coasters.

20. I once shot a flying bee with an air rifle. It was the crowning achievement of my marksmanship career, and I'll probably never be able to do it again.

21. The three people most likely to get me to throw things at my TV are Bi|| Maher, He|en Thomas and Spike |_ee.

22. I wouldn't be horribly opposed to rapists getting the death penalty. And by 'horribly opposed' I mean 'opposed at all, really.'

23. I'm not that much of an Ann Cou|ter fan. I suppose I should be, but I think there's a certain tact in presentation necessary in political punditry. A tact that she sorely lacks. That said, I’d totally date her.

24. My grandfather used to have a plaque in his living room that said 'A closed mouth gathers no foot.' I didn't get the joke until I was like 13.

25. I know how to fly fish.

26. I have red hair, but only on my face. When I was little they thought I was going to be a redhead. I’m kinda glad I’m not.

27. I can recreate Ben Fo|ds’ “Bi+ches Ain’+ Shi+” on piano. Learning it was the most accomplished I’ve ever felt in my musical career. And I’m only kinda kidding.

28. I go through phases of insomnia every so often. I’m currently in one such phase.

29. I don’t find Ange|ina Jo|ie to be all that attractive.

30. Kris+in Davis? Totally hot.

31. I am seldom more religious than I am when on a plane.

32. I have a Swedish foam mattress. It’s glorious.

33. I make a decent pasta sauce, but that’s all I’ve ever tried making.

34. The most played artists on my iPod are as follows, in this order: K@yne Wes+, Ben Fo|ds, H@rvey D@nger, J0hn Denver, W@ylon Jennings, The E@gles, M@tchbox 20, Pe+e Townsend, Bi||y Joe|, R@y Ch@rles, M@tisyahu, Rick Springfie|d, Ry@n Ad@ms, Redco@t B@nd, and Re|ient K.

35. I was gonna try to get to 50, but that’s not happening tonight. Maybe I’ll add them another time.

Just checking in

I've got more substantial material coming, but just a couple of quick things:

First, apparently I was wrong about North Korea not being crazy/stupid enough to test their long-range Taepodong missile (along with some shorter-range, giggle-inducing Nodong missiles). On the bright side, the missile doesn't work, so the North Koreans look pretty stupid. On the not-so-bright side, it doesn't look like the U.N. is going to do anything to punish the Koreans, so they're probably going to get away with it and be all the more emboldened. More on this later.

Second, I watched the Wor|d Cup game today at the French Embassy. Those people really love their soccer. It was a very interesting experience. I don't particularly like France or soccer, but I found myself getting involved in the game. I think it has something to do with the patriotism of countries competing against each other. At any rate, it's a shame that America isn't better at soccer.

Third, I have a 4th of July post of my observations from downtown yesterday, so I hope to get that up later. Stay tuned.

You want war, we'll give you war

On the eve of American Independence Day it might seem a little strange to be addressing Israeli issues, but there's been something festering in my mind for the last week or so and it becomes more infuriating with each development.

Last Sunday, members of the armed wing of H@mas crossed the Gaza border into Israel, killed two Israeli soldiers and kidnapped another one.

Normally, when a foreign military crosses into another nation and attacks that nation's military, it is nothing short of an act of war. Yet, somehow Israel is considered the aggressor and is expected to negotiate for the soldier's release.

The laughable "ultimatum" from H@mas was that the soldier would be spared if some 1,500 Palestinian prisoners were released.

I consider myself a patient, non-violent person. But if H@mas wants to commit acts of war, I think it's only appropriate for Israel to oblige and respond in kind. For too long they've exercised restraint, and it's accomplished nothing.

If Gi|ad Sha|it is executed, which at this point it is likely that he already has been, Israel should forcefully respond and make no apologies for doing so. They should no longer let their tendency for restraint become their Achi||es Heel.

And for those who think that God wouldn't approve of such a harsh campaign, I invite you to read about the wars against the Canaanites or Amalekites in the Old Testament. They didn’t mess around back then, and we shouldn’t now.

I’ve mentioned before about how I believe that humanity is a title that people must earn. Taking and executing hostages, I believe, relinquishes this title. And H@mas should be dealt with accordingly.