See you guys next year

So this is likely going to be my last post of the year and the last post for a while. A while meaning a few days. Tomorrow I'm making my way back to Georgia...Fayetteville on Friday, Athens on Saturday and part of Sunday, then back to Fayetteville. Hopefully I'll have plenty of pictures and stories to blog about upon my return. If anyone would like to see me on my whirlwind trip, you know how to get in touch with me. My flight leaves Wednesday morning.

Otherwise, have a Happy New Year, don't do anything too stupid, and I'll be in touch. In the meantime, here's the raw copy of the 'Year in Review' editorial I wrote for Monday. I have no idea how it's going to turn out after it makes its way through the editing gauntlet, but here you go:

As 2005 comes to a close, we should all reflect on the things learned in the past year, as it can be quite educational.

First, we learned — or, more accurately, were reminded — that mankind is still at the mercy of Mother Nature. And, as happens from time to time, Mother Nature was a little moody in 2005.

Following the most active hurricane season on record, the threat of an avian influenza pandemic and devastating earthquakes, in 2006 we can likely look forward to plagues of locusts and an increase in wooly mammoth stampedes.

We learned that building a major American city below sea level may not be the most prudent of ideas, especially when said city is surrounded by significant bodies of water. In learning that lesson, we were also reminded of the inherent ineptitude of government bureaucracy. Former President Ronald Reagan was spot on when he said “the nine most terrifying words in the English language are: I’m from the government and I’m here to help.” What he didn’t say, however, was that those words are so terrifying because they’re usually said four days too late and when the “help” isn’t exactly, well, helpful. We also learned that when it comes to preventing such disasters, politicians can’t be bothered. Sure, the New Orleans levee board diverted millions of dollars away from construction projects, but otherwise they couldn’t have had that nice Mardi Gras fountain.

But in 2005, we did learn what can spur politicians into action. No, not a ballooning national debt, a bankrupting Social Security system or looming energy crisis — they don’t seem to be enough to grease the gears of government. Congress will, however, convene a special session to pass non-binding, non-precedent setting legislation for a brain-damaged Florida woman and subpoena professional athletes on the pressing issue of steroid use. Sleep soundly, America — your children won’t have social security, but Barry Bonds will never hit 60 home runs again.

We also learned that some Supreme Court nominees can get confirmed by saying little, if anything, regarding legal opinions. With other Supreme Court nominees, we learned that the buddy system is not always the best policy.

We also learned that California juries are still incapable of convicting celebrity defendants, though it’s still being debated whether Robert Blake can be considered a celebrity. Michael Jackson’s trial, on the other hand, was the circus that everyone hoped it would be — complete with pajama pants, dancing on cars and that kid from the “Home Alone” movies. As Michael would say, it was charming, really charming.

In the sporting world, we learned that the National Hockey League can endure a ten month labor dispute and resume play before anyone in America notices it was gone. In baseball, we learned that when the World Series doesn’t involve the Red Sox or Yankees, it might as well not take place. We also learned that a cancer-surviving American can beat the bicycle shorts off the rest of the world — for the seventh time in a row.

We learned that journalists like Judy Miller are willing to go to jail for their principles, even if it’s unnecessary.

We learned that, even when faced with literal threats of violence and death, the Iraqi people will turn out to vote in greater force than the American people.

We learned that a mother who loses her son in war can become an instant icon of the anti-war movement, but people will stop paying attention to her once she opens her mouth on television.

We learned that the French don’t have to go to Iraq to battle militant Muslims — they can do that right at home. Though it does pose an interesting paradox when they try to surrender to themselves.

We also learned that the British are not ones to be intimidated by acts of terrorism on their own soil. Nothing funny here, just an admiring observation.

We learned that when the Catholic Church is looking for a change of pace in the papacy, they’ll replace an elderly Polish Pope with an elderly German Pope.

We also learned that when it’s a slow news day, you can’t go wrong with an adorable picture of a panda cub.

As the old cliché goes: those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it. So hopefully we’ve all made it through 2005 a little older, a little wiser and with a better understanding of the world. In 2006, we’ve got plenty to look forward to — the winter Olympics, Supreme Court confirmation hearings and midterm elections, just to name a few. Here’s hoping it’ll be just as exciting and interesting as 2005, but maybe with fewer natural disasters. After the year we’ve been through, it’s only fair.

Dazed and confused

Normally, things like this would infuriate me. And I'm sure on some level it does. But mostly, I'm just not sure what to make of it.

First of all, I have a hard time believing that this is a genuine site. I'd like to think it was some sick form of satire, but I have a hard time believing that anyone would find such a thing remotely funny.

If it is indeed an actual site and the people that run it truly do hate the military as much as they seem to, then I'm more sad and confused than I am enraged. I honestly cannot comprehend having so much contempt and disdain for another group of people that I would be so elated by their suffering and death. It must be a sad existence.

Ok, it's pretty stupid that I'm asking this, but my attempt to do so on my own was unsuccessful. Does anyone know how to make a blog roll on the side of the page? There are some things I'd like to link to, but can't seem to figure out how to do it. There's a reason I changed my major from computer science after the first year. If anyone could explain it in layman's terms I'd greatly appreciate it. I'd say I'd be your slave forever, but there are some of you that I don't trust with that kind of power. Perverts. You know who you are.

Just what I needed...

As my recent posts might suggest, I've been just a titch strung out lately. I apologize for the melancholy ramblings, and apologize in advance for the others that are likely to be forthcoming. In the meantime, however, check out this "story." It brightened my day:

A U.S. Marine squad was marching north of Basra when they came upon an Iraqi terrorist, badly injured and unconscious.

On the opposite side of the road was an American Marine in similar but less serious condition.

The Marine was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men. The squad leader asked the injured Marine what had happened.

The Marine reported, "I was heavily armed and moving north along the highway here, and coming south was a heavily armed insurgent. We saw each other and both took cover in the ditches along the road.

I yelled to him that Saddam Hussein is a miserable, lowlife, scumbag, and he yelled back that Senator Ted Kennedy is a good-for-nothing, fat, left wing liberal drunk.

So I said that Osama Bin Ladin dresses and acts like a frigid, ignorant woman!"

He retaliated by yelling, "Oh yeah? Well so does Hillary Clinton!"

"And, there we were, standing in the middle of the road, shaking hands, when a truck hit us."

The kind of crap I deal with...

We've only gotten one letter today, and that was this gem (letter changes are mine, so as to prevent search engines from stumbling in here):

I protest the nomination of Sa|\/|uel Alit0 to the Supreme C0urt and I hope that every thinking American will join me in this protest.
If confirmed Judge Alit0 will be the fifth Roman Catholic on the Supreme C0urt. With a Roman Catholic majority the court will be unbalanced; lopsided. This makeup of the court is unthinkable; mark my words, make no mistake; if this will be the makeup of our new Supreme C0urt, THIS COUNTRY WILL NO LONGER HAVE FREEDOM AS WE KNOW IT; WE CAN KISS OUR PRECIOUS FREEDOM GOODBYE!

Yeah! Gotta watch out of those Roman Catholics...those kneeling, crossing, Latin-speaking, Mary-praying, sin-confessing bastards. They aim to take away our freedom to...uh...well, this guy didn't say, exactly. Hmm.

"Religion divides people..."

While most other people are doing things like opening presents, spending time with their families and generally being happy/merry, depending on their particular denomination, I'm doing none of the above. And yeah, it's a little upsetting.

D.C. has essentially become a ghost town. Anyone with any connection to the federal government has disappeared and the college students are all on winter break. There are a few good things about this, I suppose. For one thing, when the government isn't at work, its capacity to screw things up is substantially limited. For another thing, there's ample parking. Not that it matters, because it's not like I'm driving anywhere. But it's nice to know that it's there if I need it.

Meanwhile, I'm in my apartment doing such festive things as laundry, dishes, playing video games and contemplating my own mortality. I mean, I generally consider myself to be a loner, but this is ridiculous. I suppose one thing I have to look forward to is that I get to play with fire after the sun goes down. But I digress.

As I mentioned before, one of my New Year's resolutions is to get more involved in my religion. Of all the resolutions I've made, I can foresee this one being the most difficult. Truth be told, I'm quite resentful of religion in general right now. This has been building for quite a while now, but it's just recently been boiling over.

Don't misunderstand, I'm not saying I'm becoming an atheist. I still believe in God and all those other quirky things I believe. This isn't about God. It's about the people arguing over how we're supposed to worship said deity.

Religion, as I understand it, is supposed to be a source of comfort, happiness, unity and all of that other sappy sentimental stuff. At least in my own life, however, it hasn't panned out that way.

There’s a line from a cheesy, cliché B movie that goes ‘religion divides people, but belief in something brings them together.’ I couldn’t agree more. That said, there’s an undercurrent of opinions in so-called intellectual community that religion is for the weak-minded, the stupid, or the gullible. I usually have a burning disdain for such people as they are usually pompous and arrogant hedonists that would much rather the world be free of moral judgment of any kind. I do not, in any way, wish to associate with this school of thought.

As I said before, I believe in God. I also believe that there are moral absolutes of right and wrong. But as far as ‘religion’ goes, I’m perfectly willing to entertain the idea that I could be wrong. Most people, it seems, are not. And this ranges from the most religious person of faith to the most adamant atheist.

Maybe I just have weak faith, but I’m not going down in flames for a religion that I’m not 100 percent, no-questions-asked, drop dead certain about. And to my knowledge, there is no such religion. But don’t try to tell that to several people I know.

As far as I’m concerned, God has given me more in my life than I likely deserve. On the other side of the coin, religion has taken more from me than it deserves. Not to bore you with any details and to avoid revealing too much personal information, I won’t go too in depth, but suffice it to say that religion has done more to tear my family apart than it ever has to bring us together. Along the same lines, religion has played a major role in the destruction of some very important and meaningful personal relationships I’ve had. Something just seems inherently wrong about that and it’s severely disillusioned me.

If there is a God, as I believe there is, I find it hard to believe that he/she/it would be pleased to see the extent to which religion has divided people. I realize it probably goes against stereotypical conservatism to be saying all of this, but I’ve never been much for stereotypes anyway...unless of course they’re funny stereotypes.

Anyway...that’s just something else that’s been rattling around my brain when no one else is around.

There. That's better.

Wow. I just used "opportunistic" in a text message. I'm such a dork. Just thought I'd share.

You can tell it's the Thursday before Christmas...

Because we're not doing crap at the office. Our pages are done through Tuesday, and my boss is singing Christmas carols, but inserting phrases like 'Holla back' and 'yo mamma' into musically appropriate places.

Also, I'm just screwing around on the internet, finding things like this. It's the intersection of Star Wars geek, Lego geek and engineering geek.

But hey...all the money is going to charity to build houses for Katrina victims, so that's pretty cool. I say take out the middle man and just build houses for Katrina victims out of Legos.

Well, I'm screwed.

Happy Winter Solstice, Charlie Brown

Was wandering around the internet today, and stumbled across this picture of the Pope:



Now, I'm sure the Pope's a very nice man and all that...but holy crap, that picture scares the hell out of me. And I'm not ashamed to admit it.

Personal reflections and New Year's resolutions

For what it’s worth, I’ve been sitting on this blog post for almost a week now. I’ve written and re-written it several times, though I’m not entirely sure why. But tonight just seemed like a good a time as any to let it out. So here it goes.

I often debate with myself whether or not to muddle (what I believe to be) my impersonal blog of social/political commentary with my own personal musings pertaining to my life. When I started (founded?) this blog, I felt like I needed an outlet for my political and social observations. It was also a time in my life when I felt like I had sufficient outlet for my emotions and thus did not necessitate the use of this blog for my own emotional health. Plus, I always tend to shy away from sharing my personal feelings for a few reasons.

First, I'm not so presumptuous as to believe that anyone cares about what issues may be going on in my life. As much as I might like to, when it gets down to brass tacks, I really don't have a whole hell of a lot I can complain about. Nobody likes a whiner. Secondly, I've always felt like I wasn't proficient at emoting. It's a strange paradox that I can explain the idea of supply side economics or the North Korean missile crisis, but when it comes to my personal feelings toward other people, my IQ drops 30 points and my vocabulary mainly consists of "or something," "I don't know," and "nevermind." And finally, it's just a basic defense mechanism. Putting my personal feelings out for everyone to see makes me vulnerable. So, the less vulnerable the better. Nevermind the fact that I'd likely have a heart attack at the age of 29.

I tried to at least take this blog semi-seriously under the premise that random people would be reading it, but let's be honest...who am I kidding? There's a total of about four to five people who regularly read this, and I know all of you. I don't really see my readership plummeting if I were to talk about the things crawling around my own brain every now and then.

Over the last seven months or so, the "poles" of my mind have been trading places. An outlet for my political musings has opened up in the form of the Ex@|\/|iner. Meanwhile, that aforementioned "sufficient outlet for my emotions" has closed. But such is life, so moving on.

I’ve never been much of one for New Year’s resolutions. For the last several years of my life, the start of a new year has been accompanied by a fresh batch of stress and obligations that made it difficult enough just to get by, let alone find the time or the energy to focus on my own self-consciousness.

But with the change of scenery and with my obligations for the next six months largely similar to those of the last, I feel like I finally have the opportunity to put those aspects of my life on autopilot while I focus on various parts of myself that I’ve been meaning to improve.

My broad goal for 2006 is to take better care of myself, both physically and emotionally, perhaps even spiritually. To this end, I’ve been slowly getting myself on a healthier diet, which, much to my chagrin, involves a substantial amount of food preparation on my part — I’ve heard the process referred to as ‘cooking.’ It’s rather foreign as of yet, but I think I’m getting the hang of it.

I’ve also been slowly getting back into the habit of regular physical exertion, a.k.a. exercise. The 3-4 mile a day walk to work and back just isn’t cutting it anymore. I won’t go into much detail, but suffice it to say that I’m trying to get into shape…or at least a shape other than rectangular.

On the emotional side, I’m going to make a marked effort to curb my emotionally masochistic tendencies. That is to say, I’m going to try to stop expending time, effort and emotion on the people in my life who do not want or deserve it, and try to do a better job on expending it on those that do.

I have a strange habit of vying for the attention and affection of people that are wholly uninterested in giving it to me. There was a time when I would base my self worth on such interactions and end up being frequently upset and disillusioned when I realized that I was not as high on these people’s lists of priorities as they were on mine. As upset and disillusioned as I might have been at the time, however, I was never surprised.

I’ve always had a knack for figuring people out. That is to say, I think I can predict, with a fair amount of confidence, how someone will react in a given situation. I think this comes from years of keeping my mouth shut in social situations. With my aversion to public speaking, whenever I’m placed in a large social situation, often times I will say little, if anything, opting instead to observe.

Over time, I like to think that I’ve developed a keen sense of observation and thus I can detect subtle changes in mannerisms, vocabulary, even typing style — depending on how well I know the person — which makes me quite sensitive in noticing other people’s mood changes.

What I lack, however, is an understanding of why certain people act the way they do. While I may be proficient at predicting behavior, I’m deficient in the ability of explaining it. As much as I deride others for being self-centered and self-important, I feel like I have my own shortfalls in this regard. Meaning, when someone reacts to a certain situation in a way that I wouldn’t, I genuinely don’t understand the motives behind it. I see myself as a normal, logical and (at least in most ways) decent person, so when someone acts in a way I would define as unusual, illogical or indecent, I have a difficult time digesting it. Maybe I should work on that next year, as well. Some people just suck, and I suppose I should get used to it.

Another major resolution I have for 2006 is to intensely deal with my speech. All of you know full well that I stutter, and I often feel like I talk about it more than I should. As much as I try to inform people that I stutter, I often still feel ashamed about it, and thus it becomes one of those things that everyone knows about but is afraid to mention. I'm trying to change this.

To this end, for the last couple of months I've been meeting with a stuttering support group in the D.C. area, and I've thoroughly enjoyed it. It's more refreshing than I ever thought it would be to associate with people that know exactly what it feels like to open your mouth without being sure what's going to come out of it.

During one of our meetings, we came to a consensus that 95% of people simply don't care that we stutter. It just so happens that I'm in the other 5%. I'm trying to change this as well. It's always been difficult for me to admit to others that I stutter unless I absolutely had to, mostly because I was afraid they wouldn't understand even if I told them. Thus, I'm going to do my best to make as many people understand as possible. And since there's no better place to start that than here, I want all of you to know that you can feel free to ask me anything about stuttering that you might want to know. Actually, I would appreciate it if you did.

For what it's worth, I'm also planning to take part in a fluency class next semester at the University of Maryland. I've heard great things about the course, and for once I'm actually optimistic that it can make a difference. I guess we'll see.

I'm also hoping to become more involved with my religion/spirituality. This is likely to involve quite a bit of personal revealations, as being on my own provides me quite a bit of time to pick my own brain. For too long, my religious leanings have been heavily influenced by other people in my life. Now that I don't have anyone to answer to -- anyone mortal, anyway -- I have the chance to define myself religiously, which is both liberating and terrifying at the same time. More on this later. Maybe.

At any rate, my plan for 2006 isn't to become I different person, just a better one. If I end up coming back to Atlanta...though the reasons to do so are dwindling...hopefully I'll be in better shape, physically and mentally, and speaking at least a little more fluently.

Anyway...I think I just remembered why I don't ever talk about my personal life. There are no guarantees that this post will make it to the end of the day.

Giving Muslim extremists the finger

Despite all the dooms-daying and nay-saying that it couldn’t happen, Iraqis went to the polls today to elect a permanent government for the first time in the county’s history. There are plenty of places where you can get the so-called “hard news” of the event, so I won’t go into much detail. Suffice it to say there were a few incidents of violence, but for the most part things went smoothly. Results won’t be known for quite a while, but all in all, initial indications seem to…um, indicate…that the election was largely successful.

Which is fantastic news, really, for anyone who genuinely cares about the causes of liberty, freedom and democracy, regardless of who is currently president of the United States.

There is something going on in some conservative circles, however, that doesn’t quite feel right to me — this whole thing about dipping my finger in ink to “show solidarity” with the Iraqi people. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m a staunch supporter of the Iraqi people and their fledgling democracy. I have great respect and admiration for those taking part in the democratic process despite the fact that it can literally endanger their lives and that of their families.

With all that in mind, I feel like I have no business putting ink on my finger. As far as I’m concerned, I don’t deserve that much credit, or any at all, for the current situation in Iraq. My “stand of solidarity” would only, in my opinion, bastardize what the Iraqis have had to endure to earn their ink-stained fingers.

To secure my right to vote, all I had to do was make sure I lived to be 18. In this country, that wasn’t so difficult. And to vote, all I had to do was get in my car, drive to the church down the street from my house, sign a little piece of paper, and push a few buttons.

I didn’t have to endure generations of oppression at the hands of a brutal, maniacal dictator. I didn’t have to fear torture, dismemberment or execution if I happened to be the wrong ethnicity. I didn’t have to worry that I was putting my family in danger by expressing an opinion that criticized the government.

Nor did I have anything to do with toppling the government or providing the security that allowed the seed of democracy to sprout out of the infertile dust bowl of Middle East theocracies.

The most I can take credit for is voting for the politicians in my country that helped make these elections possible.

I just wouldn’t feel right having ink on my finger when all I would have to do to get it would be to walk down to the office supply store on my lunch break. Not stand in line at a poll looking over my shoulder for cars packed with explosives.

Simply put, the Iraqis earned and deserve the ink on their fingers. Not me, nor, dare I say, many of the people sporting it.

I certainly don’t mean to burst the bubble of those showing their support for the Iraqis, because believe me, when it comes to supporting the cause, I’m front and center. I just feel like there are other ways to do it without taking away from the glory that the Iraqis deserve.

Anyway…[Forrest Gump accent] that's all I have to say about that.[/Forrest Gump accent] Nothing particularly earth-shattering, I’ll admit. Just something that’s been floating around my brain today.

Some people just aren't human beings

Since learning earlier this afternoon that California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger would not be granting clemency to Stanley “Tookie” Williams, I’ve been trying to pretend that I’m not happy about the decision. There’s a part of me that says that satisfaction should never be derived from the death of a human being, but another part of me seems to be of the — albeit rather callous — opinion that some people just deserve to die.

To say that the execution of Tookie Williams constitutes the death of a human being is, in my opinion, a bit of an overstatement. As far as I’m concerned, when you murder four people in cold blood, you’ve relinquished your reservation at the “human being” table and have taken your rightful place somewhere between a stubborn foot fungus and the fluid that collects in your mouth right before you vomit.

Not only has Tookie Williams been convicted of murdering four people in cold blood —which he later bragged about — he is also indirectly responsible for countless other deaths perpetuated through his founding of the notorious street gang the Crips.

Supporters of Tookie Wilson claim that he has changed his ways while in prison and has actually become an anti-gang activist from behind bars. Right. “But he’s even written children’s books against gang violence!” they say. This is correct. Only problem is, no one has read them. His first book sold in the neighborhood of 300 copies. Not to brag, but I’m pretty sure I could write a book of Haiku that would sell better. His second book sold — and I’m not making this up — two copies. Two. As in, the letters in the word “two” are more plentiful than the copies of books sold. Not exactly New York Times Best-selling material.

If Tookie Williams was truly the anti-gang activist people make him out to be, he would debrief the proper authorities with all he knows about the Crips so as to assist the authorities in preventing further gang violence. Needless to say, he has not done this. In fact, he’s claimed that he will take such information to his grave. It’s rather convenient really, since he’ll be there in just under 10 hours.

Contrary to what people might expect of me, I’m not the biggest fan of the death penalty. Don’t get me wrong — I’m a big fan of the idea behind the death penalty. Maybe it’s the whole believing-in-the-Old-Testament thing, but I’m all for Eye for an Eye. I firmly believe that if you maliciously take someone’s life, you have surrendered your own right to live. What I am not a fan of, however, is the process of the current death penalty.

The crimes Tookie Williams is convicted of took place some 26 years ago. That’s 26 years more than any of his four victims or their families enjoyed. I simply have a difficult time convincing myself that this is justice.

What irks me most about the whole thing is that Tookie’s supporters (at least the sane ones) are not arguing for his release, simply that he be given life in prison instead. There is no major disagreement that Williams committed these crimes, but yet there is disagreement in whether or not he should serve the sentence he was handed. On what grounds? [Chirp, chirp, chirp]

I’ve never really bought the argument that all human lives are equal. Now, before you get out the torches and pitchforks, let me explain. I firmly believe that all human beings are created equal, as our Founding Fathers so poetically expressed. That is to say, each baby is born on an even plane. What happens after that, however, determines the true worth of a person’s life.

You’re going to have a hard time convincing me that Adolph Hitler’s life is worth just as much as Ghandi’s. That said, I do believe that in the grand scheme of things, most people are roughly the same. But as I said before, I believe that some people just deserve to die. Their contribution to society has been so negative that they no longer deserve to enjoy it at any level. It just so happens that Tookie Williams is one such person. Does this make me a horrible person? I can’t tell.

Keep the gloves up, would ya?

Usually it's a good thing to get a mention on a blog as popular as Wonkette, but I'm not so sure about this one. Ouch. The ref should take a point away for that one.

All that said, that's probably one of the funniest things I've read in a while.

Fan, this is shit. Shit, meet fan.

First of all, I apologize for all the introspective, philosophical posts lately. I think I’ve gotten it out of my system for the time being. I’m pretty sure I have Seasonal Affect Disorder. This whole sunset being at 4:30 in the afternoon makes me want to slit my wrists. But I digress.

At any rate, there’s a storm forming on the horizon that could affect all of us and, to be honest, it’s rather horrifying.

Regardless of what their government says, Iran is aggressively pursuing nuclear weapons, and if they don’t have them already, they’re damn close. This prospect should be keeping leaders all over the world up at night. And to a certain extent, I’m sure it is.

For those of you who haven’t watched the news, well, ever…I’m going to let you in on a little secret — the leaders in Iran are, technically speaking, nuttier than…uh…something that’s really nutty.

Aside from that, they subsist on a blinding, irrational hatred (in as much as hate can ever be rational) of all things Western and non-Muslim. But most specifically, they hate Israel and they wish for it to be destroyed. And with the advent of an Iranian nuclear program, such a goal is feasible. And I believe the Iranian leadership is wantonly crazy enough to try it.

This should bother people for several reasons. First of all, at the most basic level, nuclear war is something that should be avoided if at all possible. We all saw what happened to Hiroshima and Nagasaki. That’s pretty messed up.

Simple humanity should dictate all out opposition to the use of nuclear weapons by one nation simply for the annihilation of another.

As if there were any other reasons needed to oppose such a scenario, Israel is one of the United States’ staunchest allies. Not only that, but a staunch ally in a region where allies are few and far between. Anyone who claims to support liberty and freedom should be among the first to defend Israel, especially when they’re surrounded by despotic, tyrannical regimes.

Of course, there’s always the question of how to deal with such a problem. The European Union, in typical European fashion, has opted to go the diplomacy route. And in typical diplomatic fashion, it isn’t working.

I often wonder why we even bother negotiating with despotic regimes. Americans can’t even trust their own politicians. Why on earth should we think that we can trust someone else’s? Asking an oppressive, propaganda-fueled government to abandon its nuclear weapons simply doesn’t work — not even when we ask nicely.

People that command obedience by force only understand force. This isn’t to say that I favor immediate military action, but we should at least impose sanctions to make it look like we mean what we’re saying. As it stands now, Iran doesn’t believe that we’re serious about disarming them — and they’re probably right.

I have very little, if any, faith that the international community will ever do what’s necessary to avert such a crisis, especially when there’s a good possibility that it won’t be easy and someone — especially a Muslim — might get their feelings hurt.

I have substantially more faith in Israel’s prowess to defend itself, as it did when a similar situation arose in Iraq in 1981. It seems, however, that Iran learned a few lessons from Iraq and has not only spread out its nuclear facilities, but put them underground. This would make an Israeli strike substantially more difficult.

To this end, it’s certainly no accident that there are nearly 200,000 American troops and other forces straddling Iran. Ever since the invasions of Iraq and Afghanistan, I’ve believed that neither of those were the true targets in the war. They were necessary steps, yes, but Iran has long been the most logical and important step in any campaign to curtail Islamofascism.

I have serious doubts about the American people’s ability to shoulder and stomach another armed conflict in the Middle East, but it might soon be necessary. I can only hope that both Republicans and Democrats will recognize the necessity of such a conflict and act without fear of domestic political repercussions.

Machiavelli said that war cannot be avoided, it can only be postponed to the advantage of others. This is no truer than with Iran. There will, at some point in the future, be conflict with Iran. The longer we wait to deal with it, the worse it will be. I have a feeling that the window has closed for handling it through peaceful means.

I suppose there’s always the possibility that the U.S. could assist in an overthrow of the Iranian government by pro-Western, pro-Democracy forces. That would be much more preferable to a face to face showdown, I’m just not sure how likely it is. The younger generation in Iran is actually rather pro-American, so that can certainly be used to our advantage, provided we don’t screw it up by pissing them off with an Iraq-esque invasion.

Whatever plan we decide to go with, we need to decide soon because if we let them get the bomb (provided they don’t already have it) that will make things enormously more complicated.

Just don’t be surprised to hear Iran popping up in the news more over the next several weeks. This is some serious stuff and it needs to be dealt with literally as soon as possible. March against global warming and AIDS all you want, but none of it will matter if we’re all vaporized at the hands of the mullahs.

On a personal note, I think it’s crap like this that gives me insomnia. Not that I’m lying awake clutching my pillow and waiting for the nuclear flash to engulf Washington, I just spend time thinking of ways to prevent that from happening. But such is the fate of an International Affairs major, I suppose.

Ok, so maybe there are some things that can still get me outraged. Though I can't exactly say it's shocking. Can we please turn Iran into a lovely sheet of glass now?

Political battle fatigue

Due to the second impending blizzard of this week, the deadlines here at the paper got bumped up several hours, thus forcing me to condense my normal eight hours of work into three. Since it was the Friday paper it wasn’t really so bad. Had it been a Thursday issue, I would have been none to pleased. But I digress, as likely none of you, as they say, give a rat’s ass.

At any rate, here I sit on my lunch break, having “put my pages to bed” as they say “in the business,” pondering the curious notion that I am currently under a winter storm warning despite the fact that I’m currently looking at clear blue skies, and — if not for the 15 degree windchill on the walk to work this morning — I would have no reason to believe it was winter.

All of this unexpected downtime, however, does give me a sorely needed (at least for my own sake) opportunity to get some of my own thoughts on to paper, or the electronic equivalent.

Before my move to D.C. I received a book as a graduation present that chronicled various outrageous events on college campuses (campi?) at the hands of liberals. There was a personal inscription on the inside cover of the book wishing me well in the future, but also urging me to keep fighting the “good fight.”

Of course, being the idealistic, vivacious recent college grad that I was, I took those words to heart and was highly motivated to move to the District and do my part to change the world.

For a little context, it might be worth mentioning that some months earlier — at one of the conservative journalist conferences I attended — I was told by someone (if memory serves correctly, it might have been Michelle Malkin) that I should be wary about working in D.C., as it was likely to “suck the life out of me.”

At the time I honestly couldn’t see that happening. Having just spent a year commanding troops on the front lines of the political battle (I love my delusions of grandeur…) and loving every second of it, it seemed perfectly logical for me to enter the hub of political dealings and, in effect, continue the fight from the inside out. Having so thoroughly enjoyed my time battling leftists on my campus, at the time I believed that battling leftists in the nation’s capitol could only be more fun.

Not so much. That isn’t to say that the life has been “sucked out of me,” as it were, but merely that I have been so over-exposed to the filth that is this government and game of politics that nothing shocks me anymore. I’m finding it harder and harder to become outraged over things that used to draw my ire.

I used to fervently watch debate shows like The O’Reilly Factor and Hannity and Colmes, ferventness has given way to exhaustion. It’s admirable in some twisted way that the people on those shows can manage to be outraged about something night after night, but I just can’t bring myself to do that anymore. It’s simply too exhausting.

Hence the term “battle fatigue.” The political war of attrition in this country — and more specifically this city — is so slothful, the changes so marginal and the tactics so sleazy that it’s a major moral dilemma of mine to figure out whether or not I wish to continue taking part in it like this.

This week, Democrat National Committee chairman Howard Dean said some rather ridiculous, obnoxious and incoherent things about the war in Iraq being a lost cause. A year ago, I would’ve been so shocked and outraged that I would have penned a 1,000 word article on the subject for the next issue of the GuardDawg.

On this occasion, however, there was no shock, no outrage. My reaction was something along the lines of ‘Well, Howard Dean’s a dumbass. That sounds about like something he’d say. Hmm…I wonder if there are any good football games on this weekend…”

Maybe it's not so much fatigue as it is a form of maturity. I'm of the opinion that suffering fools happily is not a virtue, but I'm also starting to find out that suffering fools angrily is a waste of time and resources. It is simply better to let the fool be just that and not give him the satisfaction of your irritation.

You can only hear the “Bush lied, kids died” mantra so many times before it no longer fazes you. Only so many times can you point out the strategic, political and moral stupidity of an immediate withdrawal from Iraq before you simply don’t feel like doing it again. You can only argue with people for so long before it all becomes little more than an annoying background buzz.

I’m all for fighting to “good fight,” but I believe that entails staying above the fray. Not sinking to my opponents level with rabid hatred and catchy placards or repeating the same lie over and over until it becomes true. I simply can’t expend that much energy on an outcome that, in the end, is so trivial.

I’m a firm believer in the idea that more flies are caught with honey than with vinegar, but I also believe that when an emotional argument is answered with an intellectual response, nine times out of ten, regardless of the merits of the argument, emotion is going to win. In such cases, however, I believe it is much more preferable to be intellectually sound than emotionally unstable. I say let the nutjobs go crazy. When they burn themselves out, the rational intellectuals will be standing there ready to get down to the actual business at hand.

For all my complaining that editorials force me to water down — and to an extent, dumb down — my ideas, I was pleasantly surprised to find that the lead editorial I wrote for today was minimally edited. Often times I will feel uneasy about saying that I "wrote" an editorial when it's so heavily redacted that even the sentence structure is different, but this one isn't so bad.

For those of you that prefer the raw (right...), unedited version, enjoy:

In what appears to be part of a string of proposals that the President has been “meaning to get around to,” President Bush last week unveiled a plan for immigration reform. By most accounts, this “new” proposal is little more than a repackaging of the President’s so-called “Guest Worker Program” that he proposed in early 2004. The President should, however, be given credit for rekindling a much-needed debate — even if his plan is off-target.

To be fair, immigration — especially illegal immigration — is an immensely complicated, highly polarized, divisive issue; and the political and practical realities are such that there is no quick, simple, painless — or even fair — solution on which everyone will agree.

The President’s proposal to beef up border security and deportation measures is indeed a step in the right direction, but an incomplete one. Ending the so-called policy of “catch and release” — when immigrants are apprehended only to later be released due to a lack of detention facilities — would certainly have a noticeable impact on illegal immigration, but not as large as many are hoping.

According to the Urban Institute, roughly half of illegal immigrants in 2003 came across the Mexican border. The rest entered the country perfectly legally and simply never left. Even if the southern border were to be completely fortified, it would likely reduce illegal immigration by less than half as immigrants found new ways to enter the country.

That is certainly not to marginalize the effect, as even a 40 percent reduction would be substantial, but people should not be under the impression that plugging the porous southern border will stop illegal immigration in its tracks.

Even if illegal immigration was reduced to zero, there is of course the issue of the estimated 10-12 million illegal immigrants already in the country. The President claims to be against amnesty, and there is no reason to doubt him. His guest worker plan, however, that would require immigrants to leave the country after a maximum of six years, is not likely to be well-received by the immigrant community. Nor is it likely to be effective, as is not reasonable to assume that immigrants would be lining up to participate.

Opponents of a guest worker program — or, for that matter, legitimizing immigrants in any way — seemingly fail to realize that rounding up and deporting millions of illegal immigrants is practically unfeasible, financially irresponsible and morally questionable, at best.

While blanket amnesty is certainly a slap in the face to those legally immigrating to the U.S., blanket deportations are simply never going to happen. It is no doubt unfair to those trying to immigrate illegally, but it is a harsh — not to mention unfair — reality. In dealing with this reality, there should be an avenue through which law-abiding, tax-paying, socially-contributing immigrants can pursue legal status — a sort of “earned legalization.” If, however, an illegal immigrant is detained for committing a crime, it should be perfectly reasonable and legal to deport them.

More should also be done to decrease the incentives for illegal immigration. Not only on the demand side (the draw of labor opportunities), such as prosecuting employers who knowingly hire illegal immigrants and similar means, but incentives can also be reduced on the supply side of the equation (making legal immigration more attractive.)

Our current legal immigration system — with its slothful bureaucracy, years-long waits and first-come, first-served process — is far too inefficient for any reasonable person to want to traverse.

These inefficiencies could be curtailed by things as simple as a nominal fee for an immigrant application, a standard immigrant profile that requires prospective immigrants to have certain skills or characteristics before entering the country, etc.

Such a process could weed out immigrants that are unsure of their determination to immigrate, as well as prevent those who don’t plan to contribute to American society from entering in the first place.

The fact remains, however, that none of these policies have any hope of being effective until the massive influx of illegal aliens is slowed. The bleeding must first be stopped before the wound can be treated. The fact that border security is first and foremost in the President’s plan should leave Americans (very) cautiously optimistic.

For all its faults, President Bush’s plan is at least an attempt to address a problem that three out of four Americans believe the government is not effectively addressing, according to a CBS News poll taken in October. Whether or not the plan will be effective remains to be seen. We certainly aren’t holding our breath. The President may be talking the talk, but we’ll believe it when we see it.

Mile 13

Today marks the six month anniversary of my move to D.C., and I thought for those of you that care (and mostly for the clarification of my own thoughts) I thought I’ve give a little progress report, midterm synopsis, whatever you want to call it about my experiences so far.

If you’re tuned in to hear my astute analysis of the day’s current events (ha!) I’m sorry to disappoint you. I’m sure I’ll get back to that at some point. Also, if you aren’t particularly interested in the goings-on of my life, you might wanna go ahead and skip this one.

It might be worth mentioning that I rarely talk about my personal life for a few reasons. First of all, despite living in the political hub of the known universe, my own personal experiences here are quite insignificant and inconsequential — thus far. I doubt that my hob-knobbing with other 20-something aspiring journalists, non-profit employees and other hopeful world-changers is all that interesting to any of you. Hell, most of the time it’s boring to me.

I had other reasons that I don’t talk about my personal life, but the first one suffices. So, moving on.

First of all, it’s hard to believe that I’ve already been here for six months. It’s a little overwhelming to think that a year ago I was five months away from graduating college with little or no idea of what I wanted to do with my life. The same can be said of my life up until as little as eight or nine months ago. How quickly things change, I suppose.

It’s somehow appropriate that, after the 107 degree heat index over the summer, I’m writing this while periodically looking out the window at the ensuing blizzard.*

I have a very on-again, off-again relationship with this city. I’m starting to find that I thoroughly enjoy the city itself, but am becoming increasingly displeased with the people in it.

I appreciate the fact this place is more or less the epicenter of political dealings of this country and to a certain extent the world, and I appreciate and admire the incredible history here. I enjoy walking to and from work, and being able to ride the Metro pretty much anywhere I'd ever need to go. I like the fact that winter feels like winter, though I'm sure I'll tire of that by February.

All that said, I could do without the people that live here. Or at least most of them. To begin with, I find that most people take themselves far too seriously. So many of the people I meet are so into their careers that if you can't help them advance said career, they have no interest whatsoever in anything you have to say. Everything is seen as a networking opportunity. It's nauseating. Now don't get me wrong...I'm all about networking, but give it a rest every now and then.

I don't always want to talk about tax policy, whether or not Iran already has nuclear weapons, or the whole Judy Miller/Karl Rove/Scooter Libby/Joe Wilson thing. Sometimes it's nice to just talk about football, the worthlessness of Paris Hilton or what was on Leno last night. Get over yourself. You're not that cool.

I've also become quite jaded with politics and the journalism industry. Every prejudice I had before I came here has essentially been confirmed. On the politics side, I've seen the 'dirty underbelly,' as it were, of American political dealings. It truly is a filthy, filthy system. It's as discouraging as it is disgusting. Granted, there are decent people in politics, but few start out that way and even fewer finish that way. More on this another time.

As far as American journalism goes, it's quite a sad state of affairs. There's all the talk about a liberal bias, and to a certain extent I know this to be true. I just think some people slightly exaggerate it. I do believe there's a bias in the media, but it's not to the left or right. I think the bias in the media, at least in the so-called mainstream media, is toward 'stupid.' Now, this might be more of a reflection of the audience, as so much emphasis is placed on the entertainment aspect of the news that content and edification has been relegated to the backseat. Naturally, there are sources within the media where such content and edification can be obtained, but they're not disseminated to the masses the way the ‘mainstream media’ is. But that’s also another blog post for another time.

Several people have asked me whether or not I plan to stay in D.C. after my contract is up in June. Truth be told, I’m really not sure. I’m thinking I could stay, but only if I’m offered a substantial raise. The cost of living here is astronomical, and to be honest this whole $1,200 a month rent is getting old. I could have a decent apartment in Buckhead for that much. Then again, Buckhead isn’t a mile from the White House. But I digress.

I do enjoy my job, since that seems to be the question most frequently asked of me when people are, well, asking me questions. I’m just not so sure I’m cut out for the whole ‘editorial’ route. I’m not much for toeing someone else’s line or watering down my feelings so as not to offend people. I know it’s a good skill to have and all that, and that’s fine. I’m just not sure I can do it for the rest of my life.

In the interest of full disclosure, or at least partial disclosure, it might be worth mentioning that I do have some prospective employment opportunities in the area, but it’s still up in the air. I haven’t been actively searching, so it’s certainly an ego boost that I’ve been ‘scouted,’ as it were. Of course, I could be reading too much into it and they might just want someone to empty out the trashcans, so I’m not getting my hopes up too high.

But even if the gig turns out to be what I think it might, they’re going to have to really make it worth my while to stick around. I wouldn’t say there’s a particular force pulling me back to Georgia, because there isn’t. Don’t get me wrong...I still love that place and it will always be ‘home.’ But I’m not so much drawn to the state as I am to a hand-full of people in it, and I’m just not sure if I can deal with 600 miles of distance between us anymore than I’ve already committed to. It just feels unnatural. I’m as career-oriented as the next guy, but even all the career achievements I could dream of would be hollow without sharing them with these aforementioned (albeit unnamed**) people. And that’s just a bunch of crap to sort through.

But hey...I’ve got another six months. And if I learn as much about myself in the next six months as I did in the last, I think I’ll be alright.

I apologize for boring you all with such mundane details of my life. I probably won’t do it again for another six months.

But enough about me...how are you?

*I'm from Georgia. 4 inches of snow in early December constitutes a blizzard.
**If you think you know, you don't. Well, you do, but you don't.

The 'war' on Christmas...?

Thanksgiving was last week, and that means that the so-called "Christmas season" has officially started. It also means that people are going to be getting pissed off that people are trying to 'steal' Christmas by saying 'Happy Holidays' instead of 'Merry Christmas' and calling it a 'Holiday Tree' instead of a 'Christmas Tree' and spreading 'Generic, secular pleasantries' instead of 'Christmas cheer.'

Now, I don't have a whole lot to say on the idea of the 'war' on Christmas, because as many of you know, I'm in the vast minority of Americans that don't celebrate it. Which is exactly my point. I find it hard to believe that there's a 'war' going on when 80-90% of Americans celebrate the holiday.

Granted, there are some people that are pissed off at Christmas and want it removed from the public square, but they amount to little more than a group of drunk fat guys yelling 'Freebird!' at a county fair revue. And people should react accordingly...by rolling their eyes and shaking their heads.

When 80 percent of the country celebrates a holiday, as most of you do, you have the power to tell people like me to shove it. While I don't believe there's a 'war' against Christmas going on, I do think there's rampant political correctness in this country, coupled with a -- rather inordinate -- fear of offending people. Honestly, I find this mind-blowingly stupid.

I hate to be so repetitive, but 8 in 10 Americans celebrate the holiday. I'd venture a guess that 1 in 10 are like me and don't care if there's a 'Christmas tree' in front of the White House, because I find the idea of a 'Holiday Tree,' as I said, mind-blowingly stupid. I mean really, is there anyone who doesn't know EXACTLY which holiday it's referring to?

So, are we really that emasculated so as to allow 10 percent or less of the population to dictate whether or not a store is allowed to say 'Merry Christmas'? It seems that we are. Or, I guess I should say, you are. I have nothing to do with it. As far as I'm concerned, you can have the biggest friggin' tree you can find and plant it right in your front yard. And if you wanna double your electric bill by stringing 10,000 lights around it, be my guest. And if the Wal-Mart greeter wants to wish me a Merry Christmas, let him. Just don't be offended when all I do is smile and nod.

I've yet to have anyone crap on any of my crazy religious celebrations, so don't go crapping on your own on account of me or anyone else. You can call it a Christmas Tree, Christmas present, Christmas carol, whatever you like...you're not hurting or saving my feelings either way. And if someone does get offended, just roll your eyes and shake your head.