Sunday, July 03, 2005

Like monkeys doing a math problem

As you well know, tomorrow is the 4th of July (America...fuck yeah...), but due to the fact that I have to be on a plane back to DC at 8:20 tomorrow (oh, I'm in Georgia for the weekend for those of you who didn't know...) we're having a little 4th of July shindig tonight, technically the 3rd.

Most of the people who read this have been to my house, so they'll know what I'm talking about, but for those who don't, I'll explain. My house is two stories, but because we mainly live on the first one, we only installed the central air-conditioning on the first floor. The 'bonus room' upstairs, as it were, has a little window unit air conditioner to keep it cool when we have company, such as today. There's also a window unit in the garage for a reason I do not yet understand.

So anyway...the window unit upstairs decided to stop working. Inconvenient, but not a huge deal...we could just take the one from the garage and put it upstairs. So my dad and I unscrewed the one in the garage from the window, and hauled it upstairs (naturally leaving a trail of rain water that had collected in the fan area as we went through our carpeted living room.)

My uncle joined us, as I believe it is mandatory for any male within a 500 foot radius to join in on, or at least spectate, anything involving more than one screw driver and or electrical current.

I got stuck holding the first air conditioner while my dad took the screws out of the second one, in hopes of removing it from the upstairs window. However, apparently the paint from the window had made quite a nice seal around the unit, and despite removing the screws, the airconditioner was still firmly ensconced in the window frame.

Thinking it would only need a little nudge, my dad started tapping where the unit met the frame, hoping to loosen it enough to remove it. When this was to no avail, his tapping became more of a beating, and eventually an open throttle pounding.

I could see the back (and substantially heavier) side of the unit bouncing up and down rather violently, and I could see what was about to happen.

As I stood there helplessly -- both of my arms occupied with the other unit -- I said 'Hey maybe someone should hold the other...' [Creeeeeek..thud..thud thud..scraaaaape..................CRASH]

My dad tried to catch it as it fell out of the window, rolled down the eave and off the side of the house, before crashing into a flower bed. What he would've done with it had he caught it outside the window, I'm not entirely sure.

'Yeah, I was gonna say maybe someone should hold on to the other side so it doesn't fall out of the window, but nevermind.'

'Well, it was broken anyway.'

Indeed. But I'm not getting it out of the flower bed.


Post a Comment

<< Home