The best $70 I've spent in a while

Georgia has quite a few rivals when it comes to football, but few are more bitter than the one with Georgia Tech. For my money, the only rivalry that is more bitter is the one with Florida, but Tech is different. They're not in our conference, and aside from national poll rankings, the only things at stake in the game are pride and bragging rights.

For those of you that are unaware (and judging by the people that frequent my blog, it's not many) the rivalry has earned the title "Clean, old-fashioned hate." And it always lives up to its billing.

This year was a little different for me. It was the first game I was going to attend without a Redcoat uniform, and it was the first time I was actually going to buy a ticket.

My brother had actually bought a packet of three tickets at the beginning of the season, mostly because of this game, but also because rising receiving star Calvin Johnson went to our high school and played with my brother, so it's always nice to see a former teammate succeeding.

I, however, was not so forward-thinking and actually showed up at the stadium without a ticket or even a clue as to where to get one. So, after parking (another thing I've never had to worry about at a football game) my brother and I wandered the Tech campus looking for a ticket scalper that looked slightly less-seedy than the others. After laughing in the face of a guy asking for $125, we found a guy that asked me to name my price.

Thinking I might get lucky, I started off at $40 (ha!). As expected, the scalper was noticeably underwhelmed. Long story short, we settled on $70, though I’m pretty sure I could’ve gotten it for $65.

I was mostly concerned about getting a ticket on the lower level in hopes that I could finagle my way over to the band before kick off and do a little visiting before the usher kindly asked to see my ticket and made me go to my proper section.

Well, I was right about the first part. I was able to finagle my way to the Redcoats, but there was no usher and I was never asked to return to my section. All the better.

Several of my old friends and former comrades seemed genuinely happy to see me, which I needed more than I realized. It’s always nice to know that you meant enough to people and made enough of an impression that it would brighten their day to see you again. Speaking of which, I have pictures.

Here’s Robin and me. Yes, we’re standing on the same step. She’s just tiny. That’s my brother in the background, looking bored and confused, as usual.



Here I am with Matt and Floyd. If Floyd looks a little too excited, he probably is. But that’s his natural state.



Hey it’s 'Manda.



As I said before, I was never asked to return to my seat, and thus decided to set up shop right in the middle of the Tech student section, along with about four other UGA fans. It’s quite an odd feeling to be surrounded by so many people that have nothing but disdain for you, but we dealt with it.

Being a mostly math and science institution, Tech students, for the most part, aren’t exactly wordsmiths. This was no more evident than in their attempts at trash-talking. One such exchange went thusly:

Random, rather imbibed Tech student: I wish I went to UGA, that way I could [have sexual intercourse with] my mom, and not feel bad about it.

Me: Wait, so you [have sexual intercourse with] your mom, but you feel bad about it?

Random, rather imbibed Tech student: Buh...no, but you...uh...man, shut up.

Tech students also like to make fun of the fact that the University of Georgia offers a poultry science major. Now, I know this is a foreign concept to students from a four year trade school, but at a real college, a variety of majors is offered. While students at UGA can indeed major in poultry science if they like, they may also major in cellular biology, physics and astronomy, genetics, and several other fields that don’t end in “engineering.” But I digress.

I find that Tech students aren’t exactly proficient at communication in general. Many of the students around me were quite displeased that the UGA band was in such close vicinity, and the most common means of expressing said displeasure was to extend the middle finger...for the entire game. These guys really stuck with it:



Such class.

Another popular method of expressing distaste was to hurl various projectiles at the band, including but not limited to ice, souvenir cups, hats (?), and entire drinks. This year, however, it seemed that there was less tolerance than in years past. In previous years, we’d be pelted with various objects, and it was annoying and if we could identify who did it, we’d notify security and maybe it’d get dealt with, but for the most part, we just ignored it.

This year, not so much. This year, the band staff would handle it. This classy gentleman was throwing ice at the woodwinds:



The staff handled it. Way to lay the smackdown, Jav.

The game itself was pretty exciting, but any of you that care about it already know what happened, so I’ll save you the recap.





I was just pleased to learn that due to the use of ineligible players, the three wins Tech had over us in the late 90’s had to be negated, so our streak was actually extended to 12 years in a row. So that’s nice. Now, if we could just use some of that mojo against Florida.

This is what I get for correcting letters all day

I got bored and took this internet test about 'commonly confused words,' and this is what I found. I wasn't kidding about being a stickler for grammar...though I'm a little confused as to how I scored lower on 'advanced' than I did 'expert.' Go figure.

English Genius You scored 100% Beginner, 100% Intermediate, 80% Advanced, and 100% Expert!

You did so extremely well, even I can't find a word to describe your excellence! You have the uncommon intelligence necessary to understand things that most people don't. You have an extensive vocabulary, and you're not afraid to use it properly! Way to go! Thank you so much for taking my test. I hope you enjoyed it! For the complete Answer Key, visit my blog: http://shortredhead78.blogspot.com/. My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 69% on Beginner You scored higher than 47% on Intermediate You scored higher than 7% on Advanced You scored higher than 94% on Expert Link: The Commonly Confused Words Test written by shortredhead78 on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Drivin' and Cryin' — well, actually, just Drivin'.

Some random thoughts and observations from my drive from Fayetteville to D.C.:

- According to Mapquest, it’s 667 miles from my house to my apartment and vice versa. But according to my car’s odometer, it’s only 665. I’m considering writing a letter.

- The North Carolina Department of Transportation has earned my scorn and disdain for having the infinite wisdom to close two lanes of I-85 for five miles on the busiest travel day of the year, thus extending my trip by two hours. I’m considering writing a letter.

- I probably don’t sound as good as I think I do singing Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing.”

- I’ve only recently been getting into Jackson Browne, which is weird because he’s been around for like 30 years.

- For as much as we get blamed for everything, being born a white male in the United States is still the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and I’m not ashamed to admit it. I appreciate my forefathers figuring out 400 years ago that Europe blows.

- I’m getting addicted to this pasta with pesto dish at a restaurant across the street from my office. At $10 a pop, this could become an expensive habit.

- I don’t care what anybody says. Reggie Ball still sucks. So what if he was rookie of the year in the ACC in 2003? That was before Miami and Virginia Tech entered the conference and the ACC was grading on a curve. Being rookie of the year in 2003 is like being the tallest member of the Lollipop Guild. Seriously, when your quarterback rating is only three points higher than Duke’s quarterback and you can’t count to four, you should be tarred and feathered in the public square.

- People often confuse a sense of humor with immaturity. This bothers me. Being able to laugh at things is a necessity in life. My dad has a sign in his office the says ‘Humor is to life what shock absorbers are to a car.’ I’m pretty sure it’s referencing some verse in the Bible. Or, to paraphrase Jimmy Buffett, if I couldn’t laugh, I’d probably end up killing myself.

- I’m such a stickler for grammar that I correct it in the songs I sing. I can’t stand words like “a’int” or verbs that are incorrectly conjugated. I cringe every time I hear the line in “Hey Ya” that goes “I wanna see y’all on your baddest behavior.” Yes, I know, I’m a dork.

- I think all the Red Bull I drank over the course of the trip gave me an irregular heartbeat.

- Several of the police cars you see in medians — that causes everyone to slam on their brakes — don’t actually have anyone in them. So the next time you see a police car on the side of the road, don’t bother slowing down. It’s probably just a decoy.

- We need to devise a system like the one in “I, Robot” where cars drive themselves automatically. I mean, if we can do it with planes, ships and Tomahawk missiles, what’s the hold up on my ’93 Mercury? I’m considering writing a letter.

- Whatever happened to predictability? The milkman, the paperboy, evening TV?

- Why is the theme from “Full House” in my head?

- Why does southern Virginia smell like wet newspaper?

- I’m totally flying home next time. I’m starting to believe that being thoroughly irritated for three or four hours is marginally preferable to being moderately irritated for nine or 10, or in this case, 12 hours.

Disagreeing with the President doesn't make you anti-American. Hating America makes you anti-American.

Over the last week and a half or so, President Bush and other top administration officials have been striking back against allegations that they ‘lied’ us into the war in Iraq. Such a counteroffensive is sorely overdue, and a welcome change of pace for conservatives.

The idea that President Bush exaggerated or over-hyped the intelligence regarding Iraq is simply untrue, unless those making such claims will also admit that Bill Clinton did the same thing. But, such an admission doesn’t seem likely.

Even if people want to claim that the intelligence gathered after President Bush took office in 2001 was politically motivated, anyone that’s intellectually honest would have a hard time explaining similar claims from Bill Clinton in 1998 when he said things like:

"Saddam must not be allowed to threaten his neighbors or the world with nuclear arms, poison gas or biological weapons.”

"[The military’s] mission is to attack Iraq's nuclear, chemical and biological weapons programs and its military capacity to threaten its neighbors."

"The best way to end that threat once and for all is with a new Iraqi government — a government ready to live in peace with its neighbors, a government that respects the rights of its people."

So, as it turns out, Saddam didn’t possess any nuclear arms (that we know of) and his poison gas and biological weapons were either destroyed or well-hidden ahead of the American invasion.

Now, does this mean that Bill Clinton lied? I could take the low road and bring up a perjury conviction, but in this instance, I’m going to actually side with the former President. While I suppose it’s possible that President Clinton could have exaggerated the intelligence regarding Iraq, there just doesn’t seem to be any reason why he would.

The main point is that if Bush lied, then Clinton lied. But I’ve yet to hear anyone accusing Bush of lying to also accuse Clinton of the same thing.

The fact of the matter is that Saddam Hussein was not an imminent threat. Interestingly, however, President Bush never said he was. Perhaps the most senior politician that did was Senator Jay Rockefeller, who is, incidentally, a Democrat.

What Saddam Hussein was, however, was a permanent threat, to borrow a line from Christopher Hitchens. Saddam Hussein might not have had missiles pointed at America or Israel, and he might not have given weapons to terrorist groups, but so long as he was in power, that possibility was there.

The weakened levees in New Orleans weren’t an imminent threat, either — but a permanent one. They posed no immediate danger to the citizens of New Orleans for 30 years or more, but once they became an imminent threat — that is, once they failed and water started flowing over them — it was much to late to protect against it.

Saddam Hussein wasn’t an imminent threat — but we had no business waiting for him to become one. It is much preferable, I believe, to wage a preemptive war rather than to wait until anthrax was released in Times Square or ricin was released in Union Station.

Granted, it’s perfectly reasonable to disagree with that position. This being the great country it is, everyone is entitled to their own opinion.

Something that really irks me about the political discourse in this country is the tendency on the left to martyr themselves for speaking out against the administration. There’s this belief that ‘Oh! If you disagree with this administration, you’re branded as a traitor and considered anti-American and they’re going to start hanging people for treason in the public square!’

Ok. Is it just me, or has this never happened? I know of no such examples where someone who has disagreed with the administration has been labeled a traitor, considered anti-American, brought up on treason charges and executed. Now, I’m willing to admit I’m wrong on this, so if there’s information out there to the contrary, by all means, roll it out.

Don’t misunderstand — there are indeed people that disagree with the administration that are anti-American, but their disagreement isn’t what makes them anti-American. Referring to the insurgency in Iraq — you know, that one that targets civilian women and children — as “minutemen” and rooting for them against our military — that makes you anti-American. Advocating that American soldiers frag their officers — that makes you anti-American. Taking to a microphone on the White House lawn and advocating the collapse of American society — that, by definition, makes you anti-American. Notice how I never mentioned disagreeing with the administration.

Recently, Congressman John Murtha, D-Penn., suggested that the war in Iraq could not be won and that our troops needed to withdraw. Fair enough. Naturally, there were people that were upset by this statement, and expressed their disagreement. But apparently, disagreeing with a disagreement equals charging someone with treason.

I received a letter on the subject that said, in part:

“I find it incomprehensible that Senator (actually a congressman, Ed.) Jack (actually referred to as John, but since Jack is a nickname for John, I’ll let it slide. Ed.) Murtha, a true American hero, is being viciously touted as a traitor for speaking his mind,” and “Obviously, anyone who disagrees with the administration's Iraq policy is equally guilty of treason. Does this then mean public hangings for the majority of the American people?”

I kid you not. So, I wrote back to the author and asked the following question:

“Which Administration officials have been reviling Congressman (as opposed to Senator) Murtha as a traitor? Vice President Cheney went so far as to call Mr. Murtha a patriot. President Bush referred to Congressman Murtha as a "fine man, a good man, who served our country with honor and distinction."

President Bush has even said recently that he "totally rejects" the thought that opposition to the war is unpatriotic. With all of this evidence, would you still stand by your claim that anyone who disagrees with the Administration is a traitor?”

Needless to say, I haven’t heard back.

I’ve lamented the regression of political debate in this country for quite some time, and this is just another example on a growing list of things that Americans are incapable of discussing honestly and civilly. Not only that, but Americans are apparently incapable of discussing it realistically. It is amazingly frustrating trying to have a discussion with someone who, for political reasons, denies reality in favor of their opinions. So do everyone a favor and don’t embarrass yourself by being one of those people. Seriously.

Got no where but home to go, got Ben Folds on my radio...

Anyone who can name that song gets a cookie, and no Googling. I'll know.

First of all, thanks to all the people sending kind words about my grandma. She’s doing fine right now, but she’s having to live in an assisted living facility while they treat her bacterial infection in her heart, and knowing her, she probably can’t stand it. But on the bright side(?), they can’t do the open heart until she’s over the infection, so that might be a while. Anyway.

So my friend Jessica (who shall be henceforth known as Jess’ca) and I saw Ben Folds playing with the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra Saturday. It was quite amazing. Incidentally, Olivia (the other intern at the Examiner, who shall hence forth be known as O-Fess) and one of her friends were also going, so we all rode together.



Truth be told, I was in a horrendous mood when we got there because getting from D.C. to Baltimore is more complicated than it should be, so we were late and I felt incredibly guilty. But from what I can tell we only missed a few songs and none of the good ones, in as much as Ben Folds has any songs that aren't good.

I could tell that Ben wasn't used to playing with the Orchestra and vice versa because, especially in the more up-tempo songs, they would miss a lot of downbeats and complicated rhythms that were supposed to be in unison weren’t, but that’s probably just my band nerdiness talking.

The orchestra was much better suited for the slower songs, and they played them wonderfully. My favorite was ‘Evaporated.’ There was this intricate orchestral introduction and it was hard to tell what the song was going to be, but then the orchestra led right into the piano part and dropped off completely while Ben playing it. It’s hard to explain literally, but musically it was incredible.

The album version of the song already has a string section, but there was something different about the full orchestra. If you listen to the song, there’s a little piano break after each chorus, and on the last one the violins played it along with the piano. Again, hard to explain literally, but it blew my mind. It’s one of those simple musical things that has a big impact. I cried, and I’m not ashamed to admit it. Well, maybe a little.




Another great arrangement was “Boxing,” but it felt a little rushed and I think it would’ve been even better if it’d gone a little slower. But again, might just be my inner band nerd talking.

I also thoroughly enjoyed “Landed.” There’s an orchestral arrangement of the song on the special edition of the Songs for Silverman album, but it didn’t make the ‘normal’ album, and I think for good reason. First of all, the arrangement wasn’t as good as the one in concert, and the mixing is done in such a way so as to drown out the lyrics. It just doesn’t flow like it should. But anyway.

Other good arrangements included “Stephen’s Last Night” and “Army,” although the audience kinda drowned out the orchestra during the horn break in “Army,” which in its own way was cool. “Narcolepsy” was probably my favorite orchestral arrangement as it involved an operatic singer for all the backup singing — gave it a real Don Giovanni/Stone Guest feel. I dug it.

“Not the Same” was done sans orchestra, which was nice because it reminded me of the Ben Folds shows of yore, but it still would’ve been nice to hear how he thought it should sound with a cello or two.

The encore of the show was “The Luckiest,” and again, I got all weepy like a little girl. It was a strange encore because it was such a ‘downer.’ It’s a fantastic song and all, believe me — it’s one of my favorites, but when it’s the last one of the night, you leave your seat a little bummed. At least I did.

As much as I enjoyed the show and as much as it was musically phenomenal and incredible and everything else, it wasn’t my favorite. I think my first Ben Folds show spoiled me. There’s something about leaning against the stage and watching him do a three hour set while explaining the meanings of the songs and talking to the audience in between... There’s also something about the emotion involved when there’s just one person on stage playing the hell out of their instrument, and it’s a little hard to get that with an entire orchestra behind you. But at any rate, it was definitely the second most incredible Ben Folds show I’ve ever seen.

Below you’ll see a picture of O-Fess, Dave, me, and Jess’ca after the show. I also got some sweet video, but shhh don’t tell anyone.

It's rare that my mother calls me, let alone after 10:00. It's even rarer that she leaves a voicemail, and when she said she had 'news about Grandma,' I knew it couldn't be a good thing.

Many of you know my grandmother, and know that she is one of the most caring, selfless, and all around decent people on the planet. Those of you who don't know her, your life is less enjoyable because of it. In all my life, I've never heard her utter a negative word against anyone, even those that probably deserve it. She'll be the first one there when you need help, and the last one to admit she needs it herself.

At any rate, I'm worried about her right now. She's been in the hospital for the last few days with a bladder and kidney infection -- bad enough individually, let alone together, and let alone at the age of 80. She was supposed to be released from the hospital a couple of days ago, but her condition apparently never improved enough to warrant it.

In the course of other medical tests, doctors found that her heart has two leaky valves. On top of that, the bladder/kidney infection had apparently spread to one of them, so now she has a bacterial infection in her heart. So, she's now facing a bladder infection, a kidney infection, a bacterial infection in her heart, the possibility of an infection in her bloodstream, and the possibility of needing open-heart surgery to repair it all. At the age of 80, the prospect of all of this makes me quite nervous. I worry about her ability to fight off infection, and the idea of her having to recoup after open-heart surgery is very unsettling.

I'm trying my best to stay positive, but I just have a bad feeling about it all. An any rate, that's all I have to say right now. I've been working on posts about France and the state of journalism, but none of that really matters at the moment.

Vice President's Chief of Staff indicted — no one notices

Washington was buzzing last week with the indictment of I. Lewis “Scooter” Libby, and if you’re like most Americans, your opinion on the matter is something along the lines of “who the hell is ‘Scooter’ Libby?” You are quite justified in this opinion, as most Americans have no idea who the hell Scooter Libby is.

For what it’s worth, he’s the Vice President’s Chief of Staff. He’s to Dick Cheney what Andrew Card is to President Bush. Who’s Andrew Card? Exactly.

What matters to most people is that he works at the White House, and that he’s been indicted. This has left liberals screaming for more indictments, resignations, firings, and in the case of Al Franken, executions.

But before we go gathering up our pitchforks and lighting up our torches, exactly what has happened?

Well, let’s start from the beginning. In the lead up to the Iraq war, President Bush made a statement during his State of the Union address that British intelligence had learned that Saddam Hussein had attempted to buy substantial quantities of uranium from the African country of Niger. This, in and of itself, was true. British intelligence had, in fact, learned that Saddam Hussein had attempted to buy uranium from Niger.

Enter Ambassador Joe Wilson, staunch critic of the Bush administration and opponent to war. He hears this claim about Iraq trying to buy uranium from Niger and thinks ‘I bet that’s bullshit…’ and decides he wants to check it out for himself.

Enter Valerie Plame, CIA operative and wife of Ambassador Wilson. Plame offered up her husband’s name for the trip, citing that he has good relations with the Nigerian Prime Minister and the Minister of Mining, both of which could shed some light on the whole thing regarding Iraq.

So, Wilson goes over to Niger, does some half-assed looking around, and comes back to America making all these public claims that he was sent to Niger on behalf of the Vice President and that he found no evidence of Saddam Hussein trying to buy uranium.

Well, the Vice President gets wind of this and his reaction is essentially ‘What? I didn’t send that tool to Niger. His wife probably got him the job. She works at the CIA.’ Similar reactions permeate the administration, and eventually work their way into the press, until it becomes a matter of record that Joe Wilson’s wife works for the CIA, and recommended him for the trip to Niger.

This, of course, really pisses off Joe Wilson. He starts throwing a tantrum about how his wife was ‘outed’ to punish him for his criticism of the Bush administration. This is what the psychology community refers to as ‘delusions of grandeur,’ and what most of America refers to as ‘bullshit.’

Despite their apparent rage about the whole thing, Joe Wilson and his wife still managed to find it in themselves to do a photo shoot for Vanity Fair and pull down a lucrative book deal. But I guess we all have different ways of dealing with emotions.

First of all, Joe Wilson’s wife was not ‘outed.’ The fact that she worked at the CIA was not a secret to those that knew her. Wilson’s wife’s name was not mentioned to punish him, it was mentioned to marginalize him. The fact of the matter is that he would not have made the trip to Niger if it weren’t for his wife, and that is wholly relevant to the situation.

Second, what Joe Wilson found in Niger did not debunk what the President, British intelligence, or anyone else had said about Iraq’s attempt to buy uranium from Niger. In fact, the Ambassador’s findings bolstered these claims.

Even so, the rabble-rousing on the left was loud enough to warrant an investigation by Special Prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald. But two years and many many tax dollars later, the best he could come up with was that Scooter Libby gave differing testimony about phone conversations, and apparently did so on multiple occasions, thus warranting the multiple indictments.

Now, all of this is very intriguing to me. Apparently, Scooter Libby has been indicted for lying about a crime…that never happened? How does that work? Patrick Fitzgerald set out to learn whether or not a crime was committed in the release of Valerie Plame’s name. After two years, he has been unable to come up with sufficient evidence to even charge someone with the crime. But he is going to nail someone’s ass to the wall for having conflicting memories about phone conversations that happened two years ago?

Everyone talked about how stupid it was that Martha Stewart was indicted for lying about insider trading. I’ll second that. But at least with Martha Stewart, she was lying about a crime that had actually been committed. This thing with Scooter Libby is even more asinine. I’d venture a guess that if you made someone testify as many times as Scooter Libby did, odds are there would eventually be grounds for perjury on something.

There’s been a strange reversal of roles in American politics. Democrats are now calling for Libby’s head over perjury, and are still in a state of bloodlust for Karl Rove. These are the same people claiming that Bill Clinton’s perjury charge was no big deal. Likewise, the people that were out to crucify Bill Clinton are taking a more measured approach to Libby’s case.

Both sides are full of crap. But let’s keep in mind that an indictment is not a conviction. Bill Clinton was not merely indicted of perjury. He was also convicted, impeached, and disbarred. That’s a pretty big deal.

Whether or not Libby’s case will have a similar outcome remains to be seen, as his trail isn’t likely to even begin for several months. By then, people will be back to “Who the hell is Scooter Libby?”

As it stands now, the idea that the Bush administration outed a CIA agent in retaliation for criticism seems to only exist in the mind of wishful-thinking liberals. To quote the eternally wise Donald Rumsfeld — ‘it’s just not consistent with the facts.’ What it more realistically amounts to is a game of politics on both sides. Joe Wilson tried to use his wife to criticize the administration and he got called on it. Is that really worth a two year investigation and the use of American tax dollars? Aren't we supposed to be solving poverty in New Orleans?